User blog comment:EtherealNyx/Advice With Nyx *OPEN NOW*/@comment-26890640-20150830152317/@comment-27235572-20150830164509

Let's start with Mira.

Kudos to you for making a gender queer character, but how does that affect them? I'm pretty sure he would be discriminated against, especially for having no story. How does she handle that kind of stuff?

Mira is done with servitude, why? Has she been forced to serve other people before? Is he resentful of being treated like a servant? What is their motive?

How do their mood swings affect them? What is he bitter about? How does she express her mood swings? Just having more details can make or break your character.

Also, try to put more information about their attempts to define themselves. Does he have difficulty finding ways to be herself? Details, details, details ^_^

Just try to add some more details and when you do, I will review them again if needed.

Now, on to Bonny!

Bonny gets along with everyone? Even bullies? Even people who try to force them into being a Rebel or Royal? Even people who threaten to kill them? How do they get along with everyone? Try to define the traits they enjoy to see in a person and work from there.

Going with the flow is a good trait to have, but to what extent? How far will they go with the flow? Going with the flow often means taking a side, you know. The easy way out...

Finally, how romantic are we talking here? What do they find romantic and how would they treat someone romantically? What do they think love is?

I hope these critiques helped you!