User blog:Endeavory/Mend or Defend?

First of all, if you guys haven't checked out the Art Trade Portal, I totally suggest you do.

Okay.

I think we've all been there. We've worked super hard on something we're proud of, we've tried to use techniques we know are strong and interesting. We've done all we can to make an interesting OC or a beautiful piece of art. And then we get that comment.

"Joey Jo-Jo is boring. He has no conflict in his backstory, I don't understand why that dolphin prince is his friend, he doesn't have enough flaws, and I think you drew his face wrong. Unless he's supposed to look like unicorn vomit, idk. Just trying to help! XOXO!"

Step One: Resist the urge to commit murder. Chances are good that this commenter is legit trying to help you, and that they want you to improve your work and suceed. Chances are equally good that they have a family who loves them, and would miss them if they were killed.

Sometimes, people just suck at giving advice. Constructive criticism is a skill, and all skills need to be practiced.

Step Two: Ask yourself why you're angry. Is it because you worked really hard on your OC? Is it because of the tone the commenter took? Is it something else? Really take the time to figure this out before you respond in any way.

If it's because you worked hard, consider that the commenter is trying to make your finished product more worthwhile. Since you put in all of that effort, you probably want an OC that makes people go: "Wow. That person could easily design characters for a living, and I would buy a doll of that right now." So, even though its frustrating, carefully consider the problems they've brought to your attention.

If it's because of their tone, remember that communicating badly isn't a personal attack against you.

If you look back and see that you've clearly stated that the dolphin prince bonded with Joey Jo-Jo when they were both left parentless after the destruction of Atlantis, then your commenter has reading comprehension issues. Don't diva out about this. Everyone makes mistakes. Passive-agressive retaliation makes you look super sensitive, and it'll probably make your commenter angry. So none of this: "If you bothered to read instead of complain, you would already know why the dolphin prince is his friend."

Step Three: After a cooling off period of whatever feels right (when a comment really bugs me, I take 24 hrs to step back), craft your response. Here are some good ways to reply: Here are some replies you should try to avoid: It's a big world. Not everyone is going to like your stuff, even if it's really good or nearly-perfect, because different opinions are what make art fun. That doesn't mean we have to smile when we get bad news, but we should try to be mindful about other people's feelings. Even if our own have been hurt.
 * Silence. You have permission to not say anything at all. It's not seen as impolite or stand-offish. If they leave a second comment or want to confirm you saw their message, but you don't want to engage in a long discussion, go with something like this: "Thanks for visiting my page and taking the time to comment!"
 * Telling them you're going to consider their ideas, and explaining why you might be hesitant to make certain changes. "I'm thinking a lot about the things you've pointed out, and I'm going to try and incorporate your suggestions while still keeping the character true to my original idea. It might take some time. I don't know how to clarify his relationship with the dolphin prince more, but I'll keep brainstorming."
 * Explaining why you're not making any changes. "Thanks for the comment! I'm not working anymore on Joey Jo-Jo since I'm in the middle of planning a different OC. Maybe I'll come back to him later and try to use some of your suggestions." (That last part can be a white lie.) Or even: "Joey Jo-Jo was one of my earliest projects, and while I see that he's flawed, I'm also pretty proud of him as he is. Thanks for helping!"
 * Pity. Especially false pity. "I'm sorry you're dumb and bad at reading."
 * Condescention. "Thanks for trying to help."
 * Mind-reading. "I know you think you're helping..."
 * Temper tantrums. "OMG WHY DO U EVEN COME HERE IF U HATE SO MANY OCS!"
 * This thing: "Pretty great that you're giving advice to people when your own OC's suck so hard Dyson's giving them jobs as vaccuums."

''Got any tips for handling harsh criticism? Leave a comment!''