Ariel Rucker (he/him) is a 2019-introduced and all around character.
By Blondie Lockes’ just right decree, this page is protected from vandalism.
Fact or Fiction?: Ariel Rucker
Written by Oma Boulos, Theresa Glockner, Paris Delacroix, and Florence Godfrey
Hey, is this thing on?
Oma, dear, what are you saying that to?
The camera? I’m recording this for later.
Ariel really wants a page! You guys are going to help me make it! It’ll be fun! Clean! Bonding!
Oh! Is this going to be included in the article?
Is the sky blue?
Do you want a serious answer?
I dunno, Paris! Do I?
You’re sending me mixed signals here…
Quick! Introduce yourselves! This is dragging on too long! My readers will get bored!
Hello. My name is Theresa Glockner, and I’m proud to be helping my friend Oma with her expression of her creativity.
Hi! I’m Paris Delacroix. I don’t know if I’ll be able to help, but I’ll try my best! Hey, Oma, do your readers like the outdoors?
Well, they might not, but I’m Florence Godfrey, aspiring virtuoso and loyal friend. I’m happy to be here too!
And I’m Oma Boulos, the main writer and charm of Fact or Fiction?, my passion project. I’m committed to uncovering the truth, no matter if it’s about our little society here at school or the people we interact with! This is only possible with your support, so if you appreciate my work, please consider subscribing to the Just Right Faetreon so I can get paid.
Anyway, in this article, all of us will be digging deep into the heart and mind of my… hm. My best friend, I guess. He’ll probably kill me for saying that later though.
No, he won’t. I’ll stop him for you, Oma!
Oh, Paris… How is that proper justification? We are supposed to uphold morality over using force to get our way! I fear for you, dear heart.
But it works. I do it all the time!
Oooookaaaay then! We definitely don’t have time to unpack all that! Who’s ready to start?
If we are moving on, I suppose I am as well.
My dear readers, this… is Fact or Fiction?, and today, we’ll be revealing all the quirks of your favorite fashionista.
… Okay, how did I do? I’ve never said that aloud before.
Perfect! … Wait a minute. The camera’s still recording.
All About Ariel
Personality: And the Award for Most Critical Goes To…
I think the quote says it all, really. Next!
You can’t just leave it at that!
And why not?
It’s so bland. It’ll totally ruin your readership counts; what if you get cut from the staff?
… Florence brings up an excellent point! That’s a first!
Aw, don’t be mean to Flo. He’s trying his best…
Anything for you, Paris.
Okay. Moving on from my perpetual status as the group’s punching bag, where do we start? Ariel’s… a lot.
Yes, the many layers he possesses are quite astounding. How are we meant to proceed?
Easy. Everyone, pick a trait and get ready to babble about it.
Is that an order?
Uh. Just a suggestion.
Okay! I have mine!
And I do as well!
Great! I’ll go first since this is both my blog and a benevolent dictatorship. Also, I’ve known him the longest so I call dibs.
Not dibs! Anything but dibs!
You heard me. Dibs. Ariel’s absolutely the most bitter person I know, and I know a lot of bitter people. In fact, due to growing up together, he’s always been the baseline for bitterness in my mind. There’s a lot of pent up animosity swirling around in that smart little brain of his!
Well, I personally think he’s really skeptical! He never believes what I tell him!
Not only that, but he’s stubborn. It’s impossible to get him to do things he doesn’t want to do. Trying to control him is a fool’s errand. And forget trying to reach a compromise! He can’t ever be wrong! Uh, don’t get mad at me for saying that, Ariel…
That is all so negative! You should be ashamed of yourselves!
As his friends, it is important for us to highlight his virtues rather than his faults. How could you all ignore his famous intuition?
Ariel has a wonderful sense of people. He often complains to me about horrible stomach aches, caused by the actions of the tarnished. I have never met a man with a more reliable sense of vices in others.
Well, I mean… he’s kinda hypocritical though.
He’s always telling me to go to bed at 12 when he stays up until 2!
And he always calls people self-centered when he is too…
Ooo, nice one, Florence! Ariel’s really vain! He’s always been fussy over his appearance. Once, we were playing, and I got mud all over his dress! He had a fit!
I suppose he does focus a lot on his own wants and needs…
He takes things too personally. It’s why he’s so critical!
Maybe he’s just cranky?
Probably not. Who stays cranky for 16 years?
Trust me on this, everyone, Ariel Rucker came out of the womb cranky.
He should try yoga.
Come on. Let’s be realistic here. Ariel will do yoga when Kim flies.
Hey! Don’t derail me when I’m talking; the sudden changes are going to confuse the readers! As you can see, we all love him, but it’s important to know that he has a temper. Like… a bad one.
The poor thing becomes overcome with rage at the drop of a hat. It’s quite disconcerting to watch. I’ve never had it directed at me thankfully.
That’s because Ariel does, in fact, show a considerate side every once in a while. He just likes to forget it exists.
But didn’t he explode at you once?
I mean, I did call him selfish. That was why. Kinda just slapped his berserk button super hard, you know?
Oh, I see. Good to know.
Don’t be a snitch.
Wouldn’t dream of it, I swear!
Can I just say that Ariel’s paranoid? Is that alright?
Sure. Wanna explain?
Yeah! Ariel’s super nice to me, but he’s really suspicious of other people. I think it’s probably because of his paranormal abilities! It took forever for him to open up to us.
I could explain why, but that’d be an invasion of privacy.
Since when is that one of your concerns?
It’s a concern when the person in question could destroy you with one tweet! I love him to pieces.
Sometimes, I question my sanity. Mostly, I question yours.
I’ll take that as a compliment.
Before I proceed, I’d just like to say that I resent the idea that our dear friend is paranormal in any way, shape, or form. The occult isn’t welcome here.
Oh, Paris, you make my heart shatter without even trying…
But I digress. One thing I adore about Ariel is his wit. He has a sharp tongue, yes, but he is remarkably clever in the ways of words.
I mean… Sure! He’s funny! I love his sense of humor! But he’s mostly just really sarcastic and mean.
I have to agree with Theresa here though. You really can’t deny that he’s a wordsmith!
He’s definitely a person that practically comes with his own ‘you need thick skin’ warning label.
Don’t forget how smart he is!
Paris, you are literally smarter than him.
Still! I think it’s cool! And he has street smarts. I just have mountain smarts and woods smarts.
All brands of intelligence and experience are vital to a functional world.
That was unreasonably deep. Ma’am, this is a high school news article.
I refuse to silence myself when a friend needs a boost in esteem.
Ma’am, please, my heart is melting. Take responsibility.
Look, if you can’t be serious for five seconds, I’ll take charge.
Is that a threat?
It’s a promise.
Oh, but you wouldn’t!
Ariel goes through life at an extremely fast tempo. He’s not the sort of person who slows down for anyone, and he definitely doesn’t go out of his way to spare their feelings or apologize for what he’s done wrong. In this vein, he can be pretty immature. But all of those criticisms ignore how fun it is to be around him! Sure, he might have no sense of patience, and it’s true that he’s impulsive, but I wouldn’t trust anyone more with my life. Ariel might be known for any number of things. And I hope that some are more common than others. But I know him best as my friend, and I don’t want that to change!
…. How was that?
You’re gonna make me cry here!
Nope. I haven’t cried since I was 8.
I… can believe that.
Emotional vulnerability? I don’t know her. Anyway, I think that we can all agree that Ariel just makes your life more interesting!
He goes with me to the woods a lot to look for monsters.
That isn’t safe at all!
You’re going to kill Theresa if you keep that up.
I hope not, but I wrote once about how I’d want my friends’ funerals to be if you want me to talk about that.
Absolutely not! Focus, Paris.
Don’t be hypocritical, Oma. Go ahead, Paris!
Basically, Ariel likes hanging out with me when no one else can or will, and I value that!
Great! Ariel makes fun of my music a lot, but he still listens when I need him to.
And he might loathe my fashion sense, but he’s never called me any foul names like some of the other students here.
Ariel’s not used to friends outside of me, so he’s still learning how to treat y’all. I basically never get my feelings hurt! But it’s nice to see him trying. Wouldn’t you all agree?
Okay, let’s recap. Ariel is…
Afraid of commitment!
What? We never said that.
But it’s true!
I mean. Yeah.
Are you going to leave that in?
Eh. What’s the worst that can happen anyway?
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart.”
What’s that quote from?
I don’t know.
Sounds like a motivational book!
Ten bucks it’s an out of context Bible quote.
Honey, I don’t read religious texts.
That’s a sucker’s bet anyway. You just looked it up.
Quit being a snitch! I need money!
Love you too, Oma.
Not to be a bother, but aren’t I supposed to lead the charge with this section?
Oh! Right. Well, I leave my lovely readers in your capable hands. We’ll only be interrupting minimally this time around. Capisce?
Ariel is perhaps someone who has the largest amount of interests that I know. He’s never been inclined to stick to just one thing, and he’s never at a loss for what to do. It’s all rather impressive. I hope I will be able to explain each one in a way that will be satisfactory to Oma’s audience.
From the moment I met him, I labeled Ariel as someone who was prone to dramatics. He’s rather fond of both exaggeration and blunt truth. I have also never seen a man with a greater range of expressions; most interactions with him come down to what he says with his body rather than his mouth. Is it any wonder that the stage calls to him?
An avid Drama student, he’s often involved in many areas of the play productions Ever After High puts on. Set design is one of his passions, but he also has a fondness for making costumes and performing! Ariel auditions exclusively for major roles, but never shoots for the part of the protagonists. The ‘why’ eludes me in this case. Does anyone know?
He likes acting because he can become another person.
That is usually the goal, yes. But that is not my point.
Well, uh, what is your point?
He’s marvelously good at acting, presumably because of practice. So I don’t understand why he never pursues the largest roles. It surely can’t be due to lack of confidence. Ariel has that in spades.
Oh! Yeah, no, it’s not because he’s scared.
What’s the reason then?
It’s because he thinks they’re boring.
Most artists find a passion for a style or movement that speaks to them. For Ariel, what calls his attention is surrealism. At least, that’s what he claims his works are.
To the viewer, his paintings range from vaguely disquieting to full on disturbing. Most of his artwork utilizes dark color palettes and odd imagery to convey feelings of rage, fear, and hopelessness. He often titles them after his own experiences, or cold cases that left an impression on him. Ariel claims that the vast majority are things he’s seen in his dreams, but he never seems completely satisfied with how those particular ones look. My favorite piece from him is one that is merely a dripping red circle on a white canvas. I still have no idea what it means.
I like the alien ones!
Of course you do, Paris.
He painted one for me!
That’s nice, Paris.
Watching TV Shows and Films
As a disclaimer, that was directed towards his roommate. I do not watch ‘war flicks’.
Do you even watch movies by yourself though?
No. May I continue?
Please! Go ahead.
Ariel’s quite fond of crime shows. He likes trying to figure out the twists if they’re fictional, but he’s also fascinated by true crime. In fact, I’m reasonably sure that he prefers the latter.
Thank you kindly, Florence. However, for movies, he gravitates towards psychological thrillers. His favorites are extremely unsettling.
I think they’re funny!
You are also extremely unsettling.
Oh, don’t forget the other thing about the twists!
What do you mean?
You know! The thing!
Quit being ambiguous for comedic effect.
Ugh, fine. None of you are any fun. Ariel’s terrible at figuring out any twist in the things he watches.
You can say he’s fucking bad at it if you want to, Oma! No one’s stopping you!
The dissonance between your smile and your words is horrendously uncanny.
I’m just happy to be with my friends!
Says the one insulting his friend.
It’s funny! And he loves me the most!
This was on my list, but I wasn’t aware he played an instrument!
What? He doesn’t.
So he sings?
I mean, yeah, but that’s not what I meant. Try again.
I’ve never heard anything he listens to.
Doesn’t he like rock? He definitely doesn’t like classical.
Ariel hates electronic too! And techno!
He’s not that fond of rock.
But he’s so…
We’re from Mississippi.
He likes country music.
I’m serious! Why would I lie?
Just yesterday, you lied and told me that it was possible to resurrect Mozart if you turned off the lights in the bathroom and yelled ‘Bloody Mary’ three times. Newsflash! Bloody Mary doesn’t like classical music either!
What the fuck do you mean, ‘Bloody Mary doesn’t like classical music’?
I said what I said! You’re a dick!
Does she like techno?
Or soothing nature sounds?
How are y’all glossing over the fact that he just casually said that Bloody Mary exists?
It’s not a surprise! Her musical tastes are more important.
We need to serenade her as a friend group.
Paris. That is the stupidest shit I have ever heard.
But you’re down.
Oh, I’m so down. Still, though, that’s beside the point. Ariel does in fact love country music. Ain’t you ever see him dance to Cotton Eye Joe? Or scream out the lyrics to Sweet Caroline perfectly?
I still can’t believe this. You Mississippians are terrifying.
Thank you! We try our best.
Won’t he be mad that you said that though?
Don’t worry! After this, I’m writing my very sexy obituary. I’m going to need it.
At this point, I think we’re all going to need it.
That’s okay! I have all of yours written already; I’ll just edit it a little.
Paris writing our obituaries and planning our funerals really is the least surprising thing about this entire article.
Tell me about it.
Okay, before Theresa gets the ball rolling here, I just want to say two things. One: out of context, this is my favorite Ariel quote. Two: in context, I’m still very offended that he said that to me. Ascots are in vogue, I’ll have you know!
I think I need to write your page as soon as possible so Ariel can end your life for saying that.
Friends! Hush! It is still my turn to speak!
One thing that is very close to Ariel’s heart is fashion. He is most certainly one of the most stylish people I know. Some of his outfits are even made by hand!
He’s not happy about that.
Yes, I am aware. He’s done some modeling work before, which I also think is rather impressive. However, the main reason he adores fashion is not to wear it or make it. He loves critiquing the looks of others.
It does not matter how old you are. It does not matter how long you’ve worked on an outfit. Nothing matters in the face of Ariel’s scrutiny. He’ll rake you over the coals for your aesthetic, and the worst part is that you hardly ever mind it until long after he’s left.
When Ariel talks, people listen. Even when he’s calling them trash.
Well said! I think helping you write your articles gives him a far healthier outlet for his vitriol!
Maybe! We’ll have to wait and see.
Oh! Oh! Can I talk about this one?
Go right ahead.
When we were about 8 or so, a really horrible drowning happened where we live. It was investigated for a while, but no one figured out who did it for the longest time.
No one except for Ariel.
Ariel always liked walking around back then! Everyone used to laugh at his pink dresses getting all covered in dirt. They were all really rude, but he just kept trekking. I used to always try and go with him; we were a pair after all!
But, once, I was home sick. He visited me, but quickly got bored and went out to explore by the river.
Normally, he’d come back with a shit ton of dirt caked onto his face and hands. This time, he came back drenching wet and terrified.
He had been digging around by the riverbank when he found bones. Lots of bones. Human bones. Ain’t nothing scarier than digging and finding something like that, but it only got worse. The water reached out and pulled him in. He almost drowned while trying to get away.
No one listened except for one detective. She’s not around anymore, but she thought there might be some truth to what he said, especially since he was so scared. When her team looked into the matter, they found the water spirit who was responsible.
Ariel’s been looking up to her ever since!
Oh, that’s so touching. It’s a shame he’s so terrible at it.
Ariel’s very invested in improving the legal system at least! And he knows more about forensics and famous crime cases than anyone I know.
Yeah, but he still sucks at being a detective.
One of my favorite jokes is that he got assigned to Kim because he couldn’t solve a logic puzzle for the headmaster.
I’d believe it.
That’s not true though. They got assigned for similar temperaments.
How do you know?
The other one told me!
Of course Paris knows Riddlish. Of course. Why wouldn’t he? I’m such a fool.
You said it! Not me!
Leave me alone.
I, for one, think Ariel’s dedication to becoming a detective is admirable. He is very passionate about helping others! He just isn’t consistent when it comes to showing that openly.
Case in point: he helped me update my wardrobe and then told me I looked ugly.
That’s because you gloated about it.
Creature Feature: Mississippi Mud Man
Hi! I’m Paris! Welcome to Creature Feature! Have you ever heard of the Mississippi Mud Man? It’s the state’s answer to Bigfoot!
Paris, as much as I love you, this is supposed to be Ariel’s appearance section, not a plug for your cryptid blog.
It’s relevant though! He’s from Mississippi!
It’s really not.
Ariel’s super duper pretty! I used to have a crush on him!
Please don’t kill my vibe! Okay. So. He has a really soft face when he’s not glaring at people! I’ve heard people call him ‘girly’, but I don’t think he likes that. It doesn’t really fit anyway.
Uh, he’s a lighter brown than me for starters, and his skin is really smooth! Ariel swears by cocoa butter. I don’t use it much myself, but I feel him. Oh, and he has really nice hands.
His hair? It’s so pretty. I know it’s not naturally dark red, but it looks great! Like blood! And it’s so wavy and long! I love running my hands through it. I don’t get why he styles it to cover an eye, but it looks really cool.
He’s not very tiny, even though he’s way shorter than me-
Okay. Stop. Everyone’s way shorter than you! You’re 6’1!
I know! And you all are very cute! Ariel’s skinnier than everyone, except maybe Theresa. Are they about the same?
Nah, he’s skinnier.
How do you know that?
Don’t worry about it!
He’s 5’6, which makes him the third tallest! He’s the middle boy! Oh, and let’s not forget his eyes. Well, eye.
Heaven forbid we forget his eye.
It’s super cool! It’s brown with a bit of blue - or is that blue with a bit of brown? Either way, it’s lovely. I could stare at the color for hours if it were a gem!
That’s rather sweet of you to say!
Well, it’s true! Ariel’s pretty. He’s just really edgy. Hey, can I do the fashion section this time since he’s not here?
Knock yourself out.
How to Dress your Paranormal Friend
Well. That went horribly.
What did you expect to happen though?
You know, if curses understood figures of speech, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.
Paris, are you alright?
Yup! I want to call out Ariel now.
Uh. Sure! Kno-
Sorry! Wasn’t thinking.
You know, when I first met Ariel, I thought he escaped a wedding!
[extended period of laughter]
I wish I could keysmash verbally. Laughing gets written weirdly in the transcript, and saying ha just isn’t the same.
Florence, I’ll steal your shoes.
I’m serious. I thought he was gonna get married and ran away! He looked very cool!
Do you need glasses, buddy?
It makes sense! He only had a ring on his ring finger that day, he was sprinting in heels, and he was wearing a ripped up bridal dress and nothing else! What else was I meant to think?
[extended period of laughter]
Th-That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. Why… Why would he do that…?
I try not to think about why Ariel does anything. He doesn’t even like heels.
The thought of Ariel without a ring on every finger is odd…
It really was! I like his police jacket though. The police tape print running across the sleeves is a nice touch, I think! Oh, and the police tape print on the hem of his dress? Awesome.
The growing plant details sewn at the bottom of the dress are very pretty, if I do say so myself.
Ariel did those!
Did he now?
I was there, Florence.
Did he buy a bridal dress just to rip it up?
Nah, that’s his mom’s.
… I’ll refrain from asking.
His makeup is very nice as well, even if it takes him a while.
He’s even better at eyeliner than I am!
That’s not very hard. You suck at makeup.
I like the color of his lipstick. Wouldn’t you say it suits him?
It matches his hair!
That’s Paris for ‘it looks like blood and I like it’, and I’m not sure how to feel about that.
Accept blood into your heart. It will keep you alive.
That is the most unsettling science fact.
Hey, can I tell a story real quick?
Is it relevant?
You know how Ariel wears combat boots? Well, once in middle school, he was showing me a high kick. Unfortunately, a classmate ran in front of us and got kicked in the ribs. Some broke. The end!
That’s a horrible story!
Never said it was a happy one.
I think it’s cool.
You think everything is cool.
And I’m right!
The only cool thing about this topic is Ariel’s knife necklace.
Well, it’s more a knife on a chain, isn’t it?
Still a knife necklace.
I like it!
I didn’t say otherwise.
You did just last week.
Well, jeez, I don’t have a photographic memory!
I think we all know that Paris likes it while Theresa and Florence do not.
And how do you feel about it, dear?
In the Hall of the Mountain King
Why this song?
No questions until the end please! I’m above scrutiny and most laws.
He makes a compelling argument.
Now, Ariel’s the next protagonist of The Robber Bridegroom, which is often noted as one of the most disturbing works that carry the Grimm name. I didn’t know it before I met him, because I’m obviously an Andersen, but… I have to agree.
The story involves a girl who gets engaged to a man she doesn’t quite trust. When she’s invited to visit him in the woods, she leaves a trail of peas as she follows his trail of ashes. Unfortunately, she finds out she was engaged to a murderous cannibal.
An old lady protects her, but she ends up witnessing the brutal murder of another woman. While the gang of cannibals eat the body, a finger flies into her lap. In the end, she escapes and lives to tell the story, while the robbers all perish as a result of their crimes. Pretty dark, huh?
So! How does Ariel fit in? Well, I’m glad you asked.
No one asked.
Don’t interrupt the storyteller, Paris. Ariel, being the next protagonist, is destined to get engaged to someone who wants to add him to a nice stew. In theory. Of course, with the destiny debacle, the future is never certain! Thankfully. The next bridegroom is Raider Espouse, and Ariel-
Hey! Wise guy! I have a section planned that talks about this later.
But… This is my only section.
You’ll get over it.
Theresa! Oma’s being mean to me!
That wasn’t very kind, Oma.
You should let him finish.
This is my article!
And I make it better!
He’s not wrong! Florence is funny.
Okay. Fine. You win. Go on.
Ariel doesn’t want to talk to him, but I don’t think that’s fair. He doesn’t seem very interested in the story. I mean, who would be? Sucks to be him.
He fixed my computer, so I don’t mind him.
Oh, so you don’t have any-
And that’s all the time we have for this section! Moving on! Nothing to read here!
Relationships: The Straight Scoop
Oh. Shoot. I rushed and forgot to ask. Why that song, Florence?
It goes from nice and soft to extremely loud. Like Ariel!
Pffft. Alright, so I normally do a bunch of interviews, and they take forever to type up, but I don’t feel like it this time. I mean, I was thinking about it, but I’m not interviewing you losers when you’re all here.
What do you propose we do then?
When we get to your section, just talk about your relationship with Ariel! Make it funny! Make it provocative! Make it sweet!
How do we make it provocative?
That was a joke. Please don’t try to be sexy.
Good! Let’s go. I’ll go first naturally.
Why? I would like to go first.
Oma, you’re being immature.
It’s still a no. He may have a ridiculous dynamic with Theresa, he may like Paris best, and he may have a grand time messing with Florence, but he’s known me the longest and I want to embarrass him right out the gate! You can’t stop me!
Alright, alright, just calm down.
I’m calm. I’m so calm that monks ask me about calmness. I’m really fucking calm.
Whatever you say, Oma. Whatever you say.
Oma Boulos (best friend)
Hi! Guess y’all already know my name. Sorry. I’m usually more professional than this…
Ariel and I have been friends for a long time. 10 years to be exact. We somehow haven’t killed each other yet! [brief period of laughter] That was a joke! I think.
We grew up together in Vicksburg, Mississippi. And, yeah, we’ve heard all the Hicksburg jokes before, but it honestly wasn’t too bad of a childhood. Yeah, we didn’t have friends, but we had each other. I honestly don't know if I’d be here without him.
See, I’m not the kid of a mayor. I’m just some punk who got a job as a secretary and applied. Ariel’s the one with the destiny; I’m just the smart aleck with an Internet connection.
He’d probably get mad at me for saying that though. That’s the thing about Ariel. He can insult you, but good luck insulting him or yourself! He’s always been there for me, even and especially when I didn’t ask him to be.
Do we have a healthy relationship? Yeah, I’d say so. We’re not good at comforting each other by a long shot, and our banter can get pretty nasty, but that’s the only downsides. We’re not built for that sort of thing. I’m just happy to trust and respect him in my own special way, and know he’ll do the same. Also, he picks out all my clothes, so I kinda owe him money.
Besides, even though we enable each other at probably the worst times, our other buddies always keep us in check! We’re a well oiled team, all five of us! But, I definitely know Ariel the best, and that’s how it’ll always be.
Paris Delacroix (best friend)
Ariel’s the type of person Maman always liked to warn me about. Well, actually, he’s one of two types. ‘Paris,’ she told me, ‘never trust a well-dressed person with too much money. And never mess with a well-dressed person who has a strong glare.’
Maman is very smart!
My friend Ariel is tough! You don’t want to mess with him. I’ve seen him get hit, fall down, get back up, and win a fight more times than I can count! Most people don’t like to admit they’ve been beaten by someone in a ruined wedding dress, so he usually gets away with it. I even get to help sometimes!
He’s also very warm. I’m always cold, so I like sticking close to him! It’s nice to hug your friends! It’s even nicer to cuddle them! Ariel always lets me because he likes me best.
He’s also very protective of me, which is a bit silly. I’m way stronger after all! A few of those fights were on my behalf though. I feel very guilty, but Ariel always tells me to chin up. He means a lot to me!
We’re just good together. Our imaginations combined makes some very cool things! He even makes me paintings! I don’t know if he’ll want to keep being my friend, but I love him very much, and I hope we’ll stick together forever!
Theresa Glockner (best friend)
Ariel Rucker is one of the most puzzling people I have ever met. And yet, I care deeply for his emotional and physical well-being. That is what friends do!
We do not get along on many things. We disagree on how to act in many cases. Ariel is admittedly more prone to immoral courses of action than I am, which can lead to tension. However, he does in fact have his limits, and his intentions are usually noble. It is no trial to forgive him.
Additionally, our personal set of ethics do not coincide. He often tells me that I’m normal, and that every aspect of our universe is not a piece of the divine. I tell him in return that his inconsistent opinions on ethics are a sign of shitty resolve.
I do think Ariel is a good person. We both are. He claims we’re both normal, but I know better. When it comes down to it, I enjoy his company. I wish he would take care of himself more, of course, but that’s trivial.
My biggest complaint would have to be his insistence that my fashion sense is lacking. I am very stylish and modest. We can’t all pull off bruised knuckles and eye bags.
Overall, Ariel Rucker is odd, but he is a good friend. I wish the best for him in life, even when he does not do the same for me. That may not be what friends do, but it is what I do, and I am nothing if not a good friend.
Florence Godfrey (best friend)
Jeez. I don’t even know what to say. What can anyone really say about Ariel that explains what it’s like to know him? Even I don’t have the words.
Once, I wrote a song about him. It was a really hectic composition, meant solely for the violin, to show him how I felt about his personality. He said it was shitty because it didn’t have any words. We fought about it for a while, and then he told me to play it again.
I don’t think I’ll ever get how Ariel came to be the way he is. Smarter men have tried and failed to comprehend his origin story. Oma’s the only one who mentions their past, and even he skirts around most topics. Does Ariel have any siblings? Does he have a family at all? This is the first day I’ve heard of him almost drowning, by the way. I’ve known him for 2 years, and I never would have guessed. Is he afraid of the ocean? I can’t answer any of those things.
I’m not always sure if I like Ariel. It feels, more often than not, that we simply exist in the same space a lot. But, sometimes, he’ll grab my shoulders and tell me the right thing I need to hear. He has a terrible personality, but… I can’t deny that he cares in his weird sort of way. Just not often.
Oh, and Ariel? If you’re reading this, you owe me a pen for last Friday. You know what you did.
Bora Kim (mortal enemy)
What do we do now? Did you actually interview B- I mean. Kim. Did you interview Kim?
Do I look like I have a death wish? He hates me enough already. Also, I’m too lazy. I work too hard!
Rude. We know enough about their relationship to talk about it for a minute or so, right?
They certainly don’t like each other. Isn’t that sufficient?
Hell no! It’s hate and Ariel will be livid if I leave it at that! Where’s your flair, people?!?
I don’t really get the whole hate thing. Kim has a squishy face! It’s cute!
You think everyone’s cute.
And I’m right!
Well, they’re always getting into physical altercations. I wouldn’t like someone like that either.
It’s all mutual too… I don’t get those two at all.
Eh. Probably not.
Anyway, they totally piss each other off. It’s entertaining to watch when it’s only verbal.
It’s interesting to watch them try to be civil on movie nights at least.
I wouldn’t call it civil. Ariel tried to break his arm last time.
Didn’t Kim throw his shoe at the screen though? Ariel was provoked!
If Ariel told you to jump, would you?
Jumping’s fun. I agree with Oma!
… I see.
I’ll concede that Ariel does that a lot anyway to him. It’s like his go to move. Never works, but props for trying!
Disable the arm! Classic Rucker move.
I both hate and love that it’s called a ‘Rucker move’.
Don’t they buy snacks for each other though?
Considering that said arrangement only happened when Ariel dislocated Kim’s shoulder, I don’t think that’s any bit of evidence towards them getting along. Also, Ariel purposely buys the wrong stuff 75 percent of the time anyway.
I’m sorry, Paris, but some people just never get along.
No one’s saying it isn’t. They just really hate each other.
I still wouldn’t wish Kim on anyone else though.
Raider Espouse (story mate)
Oh! The IT guy!
Yes, the IT guy.
I’ve never heard of this person before.
Sounds about right for you, Theresa. Do you ever talk to villain kids?
Some are wonderful conversationalists, so yes!
That’s surprising, not gonna lie.
However, morally, I cannot agree with the actions their destinies require. If they embrace said actions, they are not people I affiliate myself with.
Uh, good to know! Anyway, Ariel basically avoids the shit out of him. I think he’s allergic.
Are we sure it’s not psychosomatic?
Big words, buddy.
Buzz off, Oma! I know how to read!
To answer your question, I don’t know! He won’t talk to me about him. They only talked for a few moments once before Ariel went to throw up in the toilet.
That’s a horrible start to a romance!
Maybe we shouldn’t joke about that…
I didn’t mean anything by it! I just say what’s on my mind.
I’m honestly curious how Raider might feel about him, but I didn’t bother seeking him out. Too much hassle.
You really are lazy, huh?
I’ll be the first to admit it!
… Is that all we can say about this?
Damn. Well! Good talk, people!
Here we are. The conclusion. The finale.
Yup! Y’all are inexperienced, so I’ll take it from here.
Ariel Rucker is more than a bit of a mess, but I love him. He’s just that sort of guy. If you’re thinking that this feels insufficient or low quality, that’s because it is! I can’t tell you how to feel about him. I can’t dispel most of the weirder rumors. All I can do is tell you to talk to him for yourself. You’ll probably get snarked at, but you might learn something!
And I’m Florence.
Nice one, guys! You’re doing way better than Ariel did.
Why, thank you.
Thanks for reading this special edition of Fact or Fiction? and have a great day!
ArielLover4000 says: 0/10, no Ariel
OMAGERD replied to ArielLover4000: hey, weren’t u AzraLover4000
ArielLover4000 replied to OMAGERD: people change #BringArielBack
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DISSECTION OF A PERSON
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| Most of the people I dissect are assholes. Every once in a while, I’ll get a request to talk about someone who is an exception, and that is a special treat for me.
Ariel is not an exception.
Ariel possesses an incredibly abrasive personality, one created by a life of never feeling able to rely on others. Not only will he snap at people whenever he’s sufficiently annoyed, but he’ll often do the exact same thing when boredom strikes. He has an acerbic tongue that many people have been the victims of.
He feels a need to always be the right person in a conversation. Being wrong is not only unacceptable to him, but unthinkable. He will always dig in his heels and stick to the belief that he is correct, no matter how much evidence is heaped against him. Luckily, he’s rather logical, but it can be rather frustrating to deal with. Most don’t even try.
There is also the matter of him being vain. He spends countless hours trying to present himself in a way he deems ‘perfect’, and will gladly glor about both his appearance and his attire. His arrogance extends to all aspects of his life.
Ariel is not much of an extroverted individual. His convictions are strong and unchanging, but he struggles with socializing with others. Strong emotional connections unnerve him. At his core, commitment intimidates him. This manifests itself most strongly in an intense fear of marriage, something that puts a strain on any and all romantic relationships he finds himself entangled with. If given the choice, he prefers to be alone.
However, he is undeniably clever. Ariel performs well in school, and always has a plan to adapt to newfound circumstances. He mostly excels out of spite. The results speak for themselves; it’s his very own winning strategy.
In short, Ariel’s an unpleasant person. Personality wise, he’s analogous to a fruitcake. It’s a wonder that people get along with him at all.
| As always, I live to write people’s appearances in an accessible manner. I’ve bulleted key points for ease of reading.
| Ariel only interacts with a few people.
Being childhood friends, the two of them feed off of each other in the worst ways. Oma encourages his recklessness, and Ariel encourages her nosiness in kind. They are a duo that is best avoided and perhaps even scorned.
Even with their bond, they seem to take great pleasure in insulting each other. One has to wonder how close they really are if their banter so often ends in angry tears.
Surprisingly, Ariel is rather protective of Paris. Odd people flock together. Insulting Paris is a fool’s game when the outcome is almost always a fierce right hook. If the punch doesn’t hurt you, the rings will.
Paris often drags Ariel along on his wild ghost chases. If you spot them, try not to engage; Ariel is usually in a fouler mood than usual.
It’s unclear at times if these two consider each other as friends. Ariel often says cruel things to him in particular. Florence always responds, outraged. They both list each other as a ‘best friend’ despite this apparent animosity. Why Florence is somehow different from Ariel’s ‘enemies’ is unclear.
Similarly, these two do not seem overly close. They both argue heavily over numerous topics, and have never once compromised on any of them. Some would call this exhausting. Theresa calls the hostile aspects of their so-called friendship ‘tragic’ whenever Ariel is not in earshot.
Most roommates can at least get along. These two have never gotten that far. If they aren’t landing blows on each other, they’re glaring at each other, laughing at each other’s misfortune, or screaming at each other.
They both frequently threaten homicide against the other. No one knows if they are joking. No one wants to ask.
| The truth about Ariel? Buckle up. It’s a doozy.
It’s the typical story. Two parents get married quickly, have a kid, fight, and get divorced. And then one parent dies of mysterious circumstances. Surprised? That’s Ariel’s origin. Picture living in a fractured home, watching as your parents grow apart, and then having to reckon with the tragic demise of one soon after. How would you react? What would you grow into?
Ariel struggles with trusting people for obvious reasons. That in itself is not his fault. What is his fault alone is how he reacts to others.
Yes, he’s been involved in over 30 fights in the past 2 years. Yes, he mostly contends with detentions and minor suspensions. This is mainly because he either a: did not start the fight in question or b: was hurt the most. The rumors about his reasons for wearing so many rings are true; he wants an effective punch and he wants it to hurt.
Most other rumors about him are false. He has never been in a romantic relationship with Connor Tully, and he doesn’t believe in Elwood Silverstone. In fact, in regards to the former, they have never interacted. Additionally, he does not have romantic feelings for his roommate. These little bits of gossip tend to tick him off the most.
Overall, for someone so blunt, he harbors a lot of secrets. There are still a lot of mysteries to be uncovered where Ariel is concerned.
This has been an investigation of Ariel Rucker.
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Mother’s first name?
Reason for your visit?
Mmhm. Here you go.
Name: Ariel Rucker
D.O.B.: November 5, 20XX
Weight: 114 lbs
Place of Residence: Vicksburg, Mississippi
Living Parent/Guardian: Michael Rucker (biological father)
Current School: Ever After High School
Story: The Robber Bridegroom
|Ariel Rucker has been granted automatic access to witness protection services, should he so choose to utilize them, by the request of the deceased parent once his story has been completed. Try not to mess up this time.|